2011 Round Up

Hello everyone,   Christmas 2011

Sometimes it feels like I am writing one of these every 20 minutes, but in fact it has been a whole year. They keep going faster and faster and I'm reminded of two great truths: nothing changes and everything changes.

Two-Thousand Eleven has been a pretty academic year for the Fosters. Zachary has finished his Associate's. Jennifer has finished her Bachelor's. I finished my Master's. Hannah, still in her Junior Year, has done her first college class. That's a lot of studying, but we are all in preparation for the future... because it is now.

This is likely the last year we will all be together in the same house. Zack is planning on leaving the nest and heading into the world, possibly by the time you read this. He's looking around for Law Enforcement positions and prepping his pepper spray. I thought I was raising Batman, but I think we got Commissioner Gordon instead; an honest cop to a fault, and I couldn't be more proud. Too bad he can't grow a cool Gary Oldman style mustache. We are going to miss him when he goes, but are really excited to see him get out into the world and fix it. That, and Eightball wants his own room...

Hannah has become someone whom I not only love as a daughter, but enjoy spending time with as a person. She's articulate and funny, but sometimes goes off with the type of mouth Fosters are famous for. I should tell her to watch her mouth, but at times her profanity is sculpted like Michaelangelo working in four-letter words. It's an artform she is mastering, and she has the brains to back up her points. Also, we watch a lot of Doctor Who together. She's looking forward to some of the changes 2012 brings, which I will get into in a moment.

Zack isn't the only superhero in the Foster family; Jennifer—along with her academic success—has been volunteering with the Red Cross helping several families who lost their homes in fires, to include the Monument Fire which made national news this year. She's building up the resume to get to our next duty station and find some work saving the world herself. Very exciting to think about what she's going to be up to in the coming year, be it work or her own Master's program (or both). Again, we are getting ready for the next phase.

That next phase is about here. In the Spring we make what should be our last move for My Firm and return to the Great Green Northwest. About that time I should be pinning CW4, and the 36 (or possibly 24) month countdown to retirement starts then. I have truly loved My Firm, but phase two is about here, and it is time for something new. Not sure what that will be, and My Firm still wants me to give them one more trip to the badlands, but that's a small price to pay for joining the Check of the Month Club.

See? Everything is changing: new city, new jobs, new school, new ranks. Everything is staying the same: save the world, get educated, be busy. The world isn't going to end in 2012; we won't let it.

So, we ask this year you indulge us just a bit longer as we may be sporadic in reaching out. Please believe me when I tell you we love you all and we hope Christmas and the holiday season finds you all looking forward to 2012, and the New Year being kind to you. Keep calm and carry on, and we will all get through this together.   Merry Christmas!  Happy Chanukah! Happy New Year!  Occupy 2012!

The Fosters

End of Year, 2010.

So, for those who might have missed it, here's this year's holiday letter! Happy New Year...

Dear Friends and Family,
Here it is, that time again: the Holidays are upon us and it is time for your update on how we the Fosters are doing!

It has been in many ways a tough year. Jennifer and I are of the belief that every person has allotted in their lifetime a certain amount of leisure time, and a certain amount of work time; we are diligently using up our work time, and though fulfilling, there are days when we really feel like pulling some time out of the leisure bank. Moving forward though, and even occasionally seeing some of the fruits of our labors. 2010 saw Jennifer receive her Associate's Degree, and since she's been simultaneously working on two degrees, we will shortly see her walk across the stage for her Bachelor's. She's also been doing volunteer work for the Red Cross, all in preparation for fulfilling her dream of helping her fellow humans; it's a desire in sad shortage these days.

Zachary is also now a member of the work force. What started as a work study for him became a real job when the Cochise College sold their security contract to the same organization which I saw providing security for Constitution Hall last year. He's also learned about frantic midnight calls to come fill shifts for people who didn't show, and what the phrase “double shift” means. He has some promising prospects with the Sierra Vista Police Department as well, so keep your eyes open for officer Foster in the future. Yes, he WILL give you a ticket.

Then there's my scary little daughter. This young lady is bored to death with school and teenage drama, and for her sweet sixteen wanted one thing: to go to a Seahawks game (they beat the Cardinals, by the way...). She is both marvelously sly and terrifically funny, and is an incredible person of whom Jennifer and I are both very proud. She's not a kid when you sit and have a conversation with her; she is a young, witty, talented woman with whom you do not want to trifle. Amazing brain; like her father, a few motivation issues.

As for her father, I am doing all right. Busy (though not as busy as Jennifer) with school and work, and looking to see whether or not my firm will make me a Chief Warrant Officer Four this coming year. If not, 20 is plenty, and I can put this Master's I am working on to good use as funny old professor Foster in some little college somewhere. Looking forward to a corduroy jacket with tweed elbow pads to replace my current firm's ideas of fashion. Looking forward to more time for running as well. Completed my first marathon in 2010, looking forward to another in 2011. We'll see what I can do when retirement hits and I'm not playing military games at 5AM instead of running!

Let us not forget the four-legged Fosters either. You may remember our Christmas puppy from last year; Eightball has settled in, though is not less wacky, he certainly keeps poor old Patches on her toes. She is more than happy to slap him upside the head though, and it's always funny to see the dejected look he gives when she does. He's a little more tech savvy though as a young dog; find him on Facebook as “Eightball Tiberius Foster.”

So as Christmas trees sprout around us, and lights twinkle in the night, the Fosters are tired but well, and ready to get another year closer to fine...We send out love, and hope all is well with you. Hopefully we will talk to you before this time next year!

Daniel, Jennifer, Zack, Hannah, Patches, and Eightball

Anthropomorphism: A Love Story

The above picture is of Helena and I. You probably know by now about my recent purchase of a 1985 Pontiac Fiero, but let me go into some detail here.

I have been driving a 98 Honda Civic we bought new in, well, 1998. It is a great car and has served us well. When we came back from Europe in 2006, we bought Jennifer a brand new Accord V6. It's a spiffy thing, with plenty of zoom-zoom. Again, a great car, and it serves us very well.

With all of us going different directions all week long, we knew we needed a third car. The initial intention was to pass the Civic on to The Boy, and buy another new car. Then we thought about the fact we didn't really want a new car payment, so we thought we'd buy something used, and maybe pass it to The Daughter in a couple of years, and THEN buy something new. So, we looked all over. We almost bought a Prius, but they weren't able to come down where I wanted to spend. We almost bought a 2000 Civic off Craig's List, but then when the shifty bastard selling it pulled out the title, there was someone else's name on it, and some weird document with his first name and his wife's maiden name. Rather than buy his stolen car, we moved on.



The search wasn't going well. Couldn't find what we wanted which would fit our needs. Then, in my office, a guy put up a picture of this little yellow car in my price range. The pic was really fuzzy, so I asked him about it.

“It's a Fiero,” he said. Now, I knew I didn't want to pass a Fiero on to The Daughter, but at least I worked with this guy, and knew he wasn't going to sell me a stolen car, so I got his son's contact (that's who's car it was) and called to see if I could go look at it. I drove out to see it, and finally finding the street, came around the corner...



Our eyes met, and I was smitten. She sat there gleaming, and I felt something I hadn't felt for a car in a long time- adoration.

When I talked to the guy, I could tell he loved the car, but he was a bit of a motorhead, and had a lot of projects. He had to find her a new home, but he had also been very reluctant to sell her. We realized we were both referring to the car as “her” about halfway through our talk. I won't go into more details on this part, but obviously she came home with me, and I am still madly in love with this car. It's been a long time since I was in love with a car. Probably since I was 16 and had a little '76 Honda CVCC which I kept running with spit, bailing wire, and affection. Some might say it's a midlife crisis thing, but let me debunk that. The midlife crisis is a function of evolutionary psychology- the male making himself more attractive to younger breeding stock by actively demonstrating virility and the ability to provide for offspring. As much as I love this car, let's face facts: girls born the same year or after my car was made are not swooning for the bald dude in the Fiero. That's cool though, I don't need them, I have Helena.



How is it we fall in love with automobiles? They are just machines, bolted together bits of rubber and metal, burning gas to move, pumping oil to keep its engine moving. Yet, we ascribe quirks and personalities to them. We give them names (don't tell me you haven't) and use personal pronouns to refer to them. We talk to them and cajole them when they don't run properly, and smile at them when they corner well.

You ever buy your car presents? A new steering wheel cover perhaps, or find a replacement for some little tweaked component? And we hope they like it when we put them on. Now, intellectually I know it's a car, just a machine- yet in my heart, I know she is happy we found each other.



You know, just to go off on a tangent here, I look at the potential technology and artificial intelligence around us and I wonder: if we can love cars, what will happen when we make androids? Suddenly, those Cylons seem a lot more plausible.



So, here I confess my love of this car. I don't know why, we just clicked. Kind of like when you get along with a person, or meet that special someone. I love driving this car- and due to people on the road I've hated driving for a long time, even when I liked my cars. I really like having that feeling again.

Here's what's interesting. I liked the old Civic a lot. Good car, always dependable. We had a long partnership. The Civic belongs to The Boy now; he tells me he loves her. I guess they clicked.

And then I feel a little hope.

On 11 June 2009, my son Zachary graduated High School. I am a proud parent, it is true, but even better is the fact that Zack is a genuinely good man who has the desire to make the world around him a better place. Even if he weren't my son, I would admire his personality; the fact he is my son just makes me more proud.



I am of course not the only proud parent here.



Congratulations my son. Now go to college.